Chapter Text
"Should I know you?" Were the words asked of you as you stood at the kitchen sink, your hands covered in soap as you were just washing dishes that were forgotten about last night. You thought you'd do some chores and help out since you woke up so early, not expecting to run into some girl who suddenly showed up inside of the house. You were very confused as you stood there in slight terror. You had no clue who she was, and though she seemed innocent, you knew better than to just assume something based on one's looks. "Sorry, you seem nervous. I shouldn't have snuck up on you like that. Shigure let me in a couple of minutes ago."
"Ah, Kagura, it seems like you've met our newest addition." Speak of the devil and he shall appear. "Don't scare her off now, she's just getting used to things around here."
"Newest addition?" You questioned Shigure, your eyes narrowing down on him. What could that mean? You were only staying a night or two, so addition really wasn't the right way to put it. It should've been "our newest guest" or "visitor," so what was he playing at?
"Yes, I've signed you up for the admissions test to join Kyo, Yuki, and miss Tohru at their school." Shigure smiled as he tilted his head to the side, and this only confused you more because how did he get permission? How was he able to get Akito to agree to this? "You'll be staying with us here, for as long as you wish. Don't worry about the small details, those shouldn't matter to you. What should matter is that you're here now. Enjoy this freedom. We can talk more about it later, I'll explain some things to you."
Your jaw had dropped and Kagure was left confused. Your eyes traveled around, trying to get a grasp of things. You couldn't wrap your head around why this was suddenly happening, why your world was suddenly transforming for the better. This was like a dream, that's what it all felt like. You were getting that sliver of peace and freedom you always wanted. You nodded your head towards Shigure finally, agreeing to his request to talk with you later about how this was happening. You needed answers, so you were going to ask, whether it be then or later.
"Wait, so, are you a Sohma?" Kagura interrupted, trying to connect the dots. It was weird because this time Shigure wasn't so quick to protect your secret of being a part of the Zodiac. Did that mean Kagura was one herself? The girl studied you closely for two seconds, then popping back and stating her thoughts. "Are you a Zodiac, too?"
Your heart dropped to the question since you had yet to tell anyone and now she just blurted it out? Shigure wasn't even backing you up, he just left you to deal with it on your own, but thankfully, someone came down the stairs. You took a breath of relief as Kagura ran off. Turning back to the dishes to finish what you started, you stood there taking in deep breaths to focuse your mind on the task at hand.
"My darling!" You heard Kagura's voice down the hall, and it made you question who she was talking about. It obviously wasn't Shigure, so who just walked down? Curiosity killed that cat, as they say, but it was killing you not to know. You leaned back to see who she was hugging so tightly. The first thing you noticed was the orange hair, but that's all you needed to know that it was Kyo. You smirked at the fact that he seemed so uncomfortable in this girl's grasp. For being as snarky as he was, he deserved a little teasing. "Did you just get up? Are you hungry? Do you want me to make you breakfast or bring you out to go eat?" Her questions were on overload, and you giggled at her antics. Shigure didn't fail to notice your sudden joy over the casual chaos.
"I don't want any of that." Kyo tried to leave her hold and push her away from him, but she wasn't letting that happen whatsoever. "No to all of the above."
Yet, the more Kyo argued with her, fighting against her one sided love, flames practically grew in her eyes. "Don't you disrespect my care for you like that!" Kagura shouted as she pushed him into the wall closest to them, the force of it all creating a hole. That's when you grew concerned. Did that not hurt Kyo?
"Don't worry yourself over those two, they destroy my house all the time." Shigure had tears streaming down his face as he smiled a hopeless smile. You wanted to laugh at his misery while the two teens created early morning turmoil.
Of course the ruckus woke up the other two, Yuki and Tohru coming down the stairs to prove it. "What's the point of this?" Yuki sighed in disappointment as Tohru stood behind him, peeking out over his shoulder. He did help though, Kagura had stopped tormenting Kyo and Shigure's home at least.
"I was just making a visit for my darling, Kyo!" Kagura had switched back into her happy-go-lucky attitude she held just 5 minutes ago. It was weird to suddenly see it, her mood changed so fast as she was quick to snatch the poor boy back into her arms.
"You are wrecking my house." Shigure pointed out with a slight sigh as he opened his fan back up to use for himself. He was obviously not happy about any of this, but you knew he'd probably take money from their personal bank accounts that all of you Sohma's have. "Anywho, you two are more than welcome to do as you please for breakfast, but what shall the rest of us do?"
"No! Don't let her think she can do whatever she wants with me!" Kyo shouted, getting forcefully stopped as he was squeezed into Kagura's hug more intensely. It was obvious she had no intent to let him go.
"I'll go ahead and make us breakfast then." Tohru let out a gentle giggle as she walked past Yuki and started heading her way towards the kitchen where you stood in the doorway.
"No! Let me!" Kagura was quick to jump over, only she was a bit too aggressive with her sudden movement. Her hand landed on Tohru's shoulder as she tried to get ahead of her, but her touch was too much force, and it unfortunately pushed Tohru into your direction.
Your world paused in fear of what would happen, how people would see you, what they'd think of you if you transformed, let alone to a girl's touch. Your heart skipped a beat as you didn't know whether to be support for Tohru's fall or move out of the way and let her tumble, then be blamed. Yet, when faced with this choice, you couldn't just let her fall, after all she's done, so you risked it. The only time you've risked a secret in a very long time.
You reached out to catch the girl who was falling into you, ready to catch her. The moment her body collided into yours, smoke appeared, a dark blue that looked like the night sky. The others were worried one moment, then confused, except for Shigure and Kagura. The next thing everyone knew, Tohru was sitting on the ground, her hands holding her top half up as you laid there on the ground as a black cat. The moment you could, you lifted your head, shaking it as you looked at Tohru. You stood up moving to sit in front of her face. "Are you okay?"
You were not expecting the reaction Tohru gave as she stared at you with a confused smile, "Another cat?" As if all she could see were swirls of her own imagination, she just stared at you blankly. "Huh?"
"I am so sorry!" Kagura immediately apologized as she ran over and crouched beside both of you. "I didn't mean to push you that hard, I only wanted to get into the kitchen!" Her apology was nice to hear, but it wasn't something so serious to you that it needed to be so dramatic. You knew she only wanted to handle breakfast for the one she loved.
"She's part of the Zodiac?" Yuki questioned as he looked at you while speaking to Shigure knowing he chose to stay quiet about it. "You had us worried over nothing because you didn't want to tell us anything?"
"Why are you never at the banquets when you have a zodiac spirit?" Kagura now looked in your direction and your mind went blank. There was a lot going on outside and inside of your head, you didn't know where to begin or how to even respond.
"She's special." Shigure responded, though it wasn't helpful because now everyone would question why that is or what it means. Nothing Shigure did was very helpful, even if he intended to help, it never went that way. "Of course, there's more to it, but that can be saved for the person in question to explain. Though, now might not be a good time, given her anxious state."
"I'm not anxious." Your voice was a lot more stern than it was minutes ago, this was the first time any of them saw this side of you, as well as your Zodiac form. You turned to look away from Shigure, giving him your back as you sat down once more, wrapping your tail around you, resting the end of it over your paws.
This pulled a small chuckle from Shigure, you could just tell he found this all amusing. He was ten times more annoying than usual, and you knew it was because of the animal you took the form of. "I always forget how you act when you transform." Shigure added, bringing you to look back over your shoulder at him, your eyes narrowed on him.
"So... are you another cat..?" Tohru put the question out there and you were quick to face her direction again. Whether to answer or not, you hesitated, looking to the ground as you felt all eyes on you. It was like there was some spotlight on you, the stage set as you struggled to get the words out. Shigure was right, you were anxious, more anxious than you wanted to let on.
Most people have forgotten about you and your soul entirely, most people being almost all. There may be a select few out there, but some of the other zodiacs don't even know who you are, those were the ones Akito denied you access to meet. "I'm... forgotten. The tale of banquet never specified the details entirely, but that's fair since it is used as a folk tale, there's no need for minutiae as such. You could say that I'm the banquet of those stories, the one that reconnects everyone each time."
"The cat is not the only animal she transforms into." Shigure continued for you as you kept your eyes on the floor. You were happy he did, and in knowing that he bothered you a lot let less, you knew you were about to transform back. The moment you did and the smoke appeared, you wrapped your arms across your chest and crossed your legs, leaning forward to hide away as Shigure stepped in to hide your vulnerable form, his back to you as he looked at everyone so you could grab the clothes you transformed out of. "Being the aligning soul, she has a unique set of capabilities."
"Aligning soul?" Yuki questioned the name, but when it was all said it was done, it's only a guess of the name. It's been well over a century since the last reincarnation, this soul has hardly ever been reborn but a handful of times.
Tohru glanced back at the others as Kagura offered her help off the ground, "You don't-... You three don't know her?" The girl almost seemed concerned, but it made sense. Why were you left out? Why were you kept hidden away like some precious jewel? You questioned it all yourself, but you've heard rumors from those who passed your room when you were back at the main estate.
People would walk by your room's always closed door, talking about you or other things while not even realizing you were on the other side. You understood that you weren't really known throughout the entirety of the Sohma estate, but you wished for someone, anyone, to just care. Yet, even those who knew of you saw your story as special, that you had everything in life because you were seated at the right hand of the god. Little did they know that he refused to use you as a pawn and instead kept you to himself, using and abusing you behind closed doors.
You didn't know what to do or say to put Tohru's concerns at ease; you wanted to because you were starting to deeply care about the girl, but how felt like a different thing entirely.
"If she's willing to tell you..." Shigure looked over at you before continuing, noticing how you kept your eyes on the ground and not looking anywhere else. It was like you were trying to hide away, pretend that you weren't even there. "I'd let her on her own time. It's a bit to unload, even I don't understand it."
Though, it's not like you did either. Why were you Akito's pet? Why did he have a collar around your neck while the others were tethered to a rope by their wrists? It didn't feel fair, none of it did, but if there's one thing you were happy about, it was that you were the one enduring this pain and not anyone else. For some reason, you felt obligated to be happy for the others as they got to experience life.
"Don't let me forget to talk with you about school tonight when I get back." Shigure turned to you as Kagura entered the kitchen, dragging Tohru with her as you felt her eyes on you. You knew Tohru was probably just worried about you, but you were ashamed to look in her direction at the moment. Too much had happened, your thoughts were swirling, and Shigure could tell. "Alright, I'm off kids. Have fun, but not too much!" Shigure waved with a cheeky grin as he walked over to the front door. Tohru bowed as he left, and it really spoke meanings to you. She was an extremely polite girl, it made you want to know more about her, like why she was always so kind or caring.
Everything that had just gone down... you felt awkward to speak or do anything. You just stood in the corner, trying to process what to do. You wish you could just snap back to normal, but all you could remember was him... Akito was at the front of your mind no matter how hard you tried to suppress it. Those dark gray eyes glaring down at you, piercing your soul with a smirk plastered on his face. The gentleness of his touch, that can turn rough within seconds, it all sends shivers down your spine. His honey-soft voice that makes your heart stop and your skin crawl. The anxieties he gives you, telling you how worthless you are, in case you forgot. He would never allow you to forget when his hand moves faster than you can react, a cold sting left on your face in its wake
"Hey... are you hungry?" Tohru's voice immediately snaps you back into reality with a small jump. You instinctively stepped backwards with fear until you realized exactly who it was in front of you. "I'm sorry! Did I scare you? I didn't mean to-!"
"Don't over do it, miss Honda." Yuki placed a gentle hand on her shoulder as he offered her a smile before giving it to you. He looks at you differently, though, with more concern as if he was trying to read your mind, get a grasp on how your brain works. In seconds he's turned back to Tohru. "Why don't you go help out Kagura, I'll try to get that idiot cat to the table."
"I'm not an idiot!" Kyo shouted and it helped lighten up your mood. Despite it being bickering and fighting, it was a different kind compared to what you were used to; this one was more empty, like there were no true bad intentions behind it, just some teasing words to get on each other's nerves.
Yuki looked back to you, his smile getting softer as his gaze was nothing but comforting, the opposite of what Akito's was, "Would you like to eat with us? Or would you rather being alone right now?" He proposed what your options were, which was easier to understand than a vague question with how fast your brain was working currently. "Either way, none of us will be offended. You can take your time getting to know us, I know Kyo can be a pain."
"You smug rat!" Yuki earned himself another shout to the hot-tempered cat who was easy to pick on.
With a soft smile, that you let only get so far as to hold in a laugh, you thought of your answer. With a deep breath, and your smile fading, you replied, "I think... I'd like to be alone." Because if you were to join them, it might do you worse than better, and you didn't want them to dial it down for you. You didn't want to ruin the mood the weekend gave.
"You can eat in our room, I really don't mind." Tohru looked back at you as she began plating some of the food her and Kagura cooked up. When everything was done and cooked, she finished your plate and held it out for you to take, so you stepped forward and held onto it, the heavenly aroma hitting your nose and making your stomach growl in anticipation.
"Thank you." You slightly bowed to the girl, then to Yuki, before walking off to the staircase. You headed up, taking your time and making sure not to spill anything.
The kindness that surrounded you was enlightening, it showed you the warmth you only dreamt of having before. You ate with tears in your eyes, joyful and thankful tears, while the sun's morning beam warmed your face.
♥︎
"So, your admissions test is tomorrow." Shigure leaned back in the chair he had in his room. He sat in front of his desk, slightly turned to face you as you sat on the floor. The only light in the room was coming from his desk light. "It's decently early in the morning, but once it's all over, we should receive word on whether you were accepted or not that afternoon. That's what's going to decide if you stay here or not, it's what I was able to get Akito to agree to."
Just the name alone sent shivers rolling down your spine as you looked down at the floor beneath you, "How did you get him to agree with it..? With any of this?" You had a right to want to know did Shigure hold power over Akito in some way, or was Akito just hoping to watch you collapse in the real world?
"I have my ways." Shigure's smile was off putting, and you didn't want to know any more about it after all. All you could do was appreciate him for helping you get as far as you were. "You know... even after all this, and let's say you get in, I still can't promise your safety. You and I both know Akito won't be happy about this, hell, he's not pleased with it in the slightest currently. There's no way of making him either, so, what will you do if suddenly face to face with him again?"
Your breath hitched in your throat, that tightening feeling returning after what felt like so long without it being there. You held back tears as you tried to think through it logically because he was right, what would you do? "I-... I don't know." Was all you could manage to choke out. You knew you couldn't be protected from Akito, and at that point, if you needed to bite the bullet to protect those who have shown you so much kindness, you would. Now, you have friends to protect, to be there for as they are for you. "I'll take whatever he wants to throw at me."
"Like you always do?" Shigure's words made you look up at him. His eyes narrowed on you and made that barbed wire around your neck tighten from the disappointment you felt for yourself. "You are just a shy little thing, aren't you? Can't stand up to Akito like the others? Like me?"
With every word, your chest tightened as much as your throat, your eyes finding comfort staring down at the floor since it never looked back at you with eyes that gave you a despair, "Shigure, please-." Your breath hitched once more as he leaned forward to hear your quiet voice. "You don't understand-."
"What do I not understand, cherry?" You remembered that nickname... and hearing it from Shigure in this instance made you upset. To use it in such a way against you when you only remember it with warmth struck something in you. "You let Akito walk all over you, there isn't much more to it."
"Because if I don't, the rest of you will get hurt!" You finally blurted out, the anger-filled bubble inside of you popping. Shigure smirked, seeming to have got what he was trying to get out of you all this time. "And never call me by that nickname with the intention of insulting me. You know I hold it dear."
"Exactly why I used it, because I wanted to see you get riled up." Shigure leaned back in his chair, his smirk unwavering as he began to fidget with the pen he held in his hand. At least he spoke on the truth behind his annoying actions. "You gave me exactly what I wanted."
"Why was that what you wanted?" You questioned, sitting up more as you no longer feared looking at him. You wanted answers, real reasons that explained his actions, not some lengthy excuse. "I'm not a mind reader, you know. I don't understand why you do half the things you do, so tell me."
"Because that's how you need to confront Akito." It wasn't the answer you were looking for, or expecting, but it's what you were handed. Whether that's what you wanted to hear or not, Shigure didn't care. "What I said before wasn't an exaggeration, it's far from it. Akito doesn't even see you as a person anymore, you are no more than a toy-."
"Don't say it like you think I don't already know." You cut Shigure off, not wanting to hear those words said out loud from yet another person.
"Then why don't you do anything about it?" Shigure just couldn't drop the topic, he was too involved, he wanted you to go against Akito, but was he really doing it for your sake like he'd probably tell you? You doubted it.
"Because I can't, Shigure." Your voice held firm as you tried to explain, even if the words were difficult to find. "There's nothing I can do against him that will ever give me the upper hand. Trust me, I've tried." You pointed to yourself with one hand as the other balled itself into a fist.
"To me, it seems like you haven't tried hard enough." Shigure turned in his chair to face his desk as he had been when he invited you in.
